I hate myself tonight I hurt the cat, well....I shook her I got in such a rage I shook her and grabbed her foot and she twisted and she hissed....part of me wanted her to rip my hand off, bite me and scratch me.

I started crying after and went out and she's under the clothes rack all huddled up hating me and she should.
This is the same cat I accuse my ex of neglecting. And I"M abusing the poor thing.

I want to cut myself, tear my hands off, but I can't find my tools and all the ones I do find are blunt and I hate myself hate myself.

See why I can't have kids? Can you imagine me with children? I'd kill them, I know I would. I am a horrible person I am scum I don't deserve to be here. i can't even handle a pet cat. I've never hurt any animal before I moved in with my girlfriend (now ex-girlfriend and yes I am moving, but I'm still here)
What the hell is wrong with me???