Came back to see how you were. I don't read this forum as much as some of the others.

Glad to hear you are feeling a bit better and have some sense of direction for yourself, as to where you want to be. You seem to really be looking at things as realistically as you probably can right now, in your pain. I am amazed at the grasp yo seem to have of your situation and what it means for you. I know a lot of this is new pains being felt, perhaps on top of old hurts. He may be doing the best he can for you right now, from the way you describe him. He is obviously not thinking rationally but speaking out of some likely unconscious fear, that something may be required of him, more than he is able to give. For me, that is a sorrow in itself, to be forced to see your love as he is, not as the man you would have liked him to be. Hugs to you again!