People with BPD often take psych meds because they frequently have a co-occurring Axis I disorder, such as depression. So if you do take meds, you could think of them not as being for BPD but for dysthymic disorder. Don't know if that helps. Someone I know was involved in a clinical study looking at different meds or different therapies for BPD. The clear winner was DBT--better than meds. So if you are strongly concerned that you only be given a treatment that is evidence-based, then logically, that would mean you would choose DBT. Yet you've chosen IFS therapy instead of DBT and find it is helping you a lot. My point is, that the evidence based treatments work for many people, but not all. And the studies never test all treatments, just a few. So if you're so concerned that anti-depressants don't have good evidence that they can help with BPD, you could think of them as the IFS of the meds world.

Remember, you can always quit the meds if they don't help. SSRIs do not have awful side effects that don't go away. If they have side effects you don't like, you can just stop taking them. (You may be thinking of the old anti-psychotics, which could cause permanent changes in facial expressions and movements.)

My guess is she thinks meds could help you because of the dysthymic disorder and anxiety, for which SSRIs are frequently prescribed.

Rainbow, you don't have to try meds if you don't want to. You seem to have a lot of questions about side effects, whether meds would cause permanent changes in you, whether you might feel like a zombie, etc. Maybe it would be worthwhile just to schedule a session with a pdoc and talk about all of these things. Having more information might help making up your mind easier.