gosh, I think I am going to make you mad at me, too, but that really DOES sound productive, dear Squiggle! It really does! I have had a session or 2 like that.....it's leading somewhere forward, whether it felt that way or not!
And your T is right, you are not a child! She does not have to MAKE you talk, she does not have to try to make you mad - my T said to me before that she thought I was trying to push her into making me mad, into hurting me. I wanted her to whip me so to speak with her words. She said she is not going to play that game.....and she doesn't have to, because it was, is, a game. We aren't paying Ts to play those games with us. We might WANT them to make us do something, make us talk, make us mad, but they aren't going to play into that sort of wish. They want talking, feeling, to be our choice, not something they manipulate us into.
Your T, as much as you hate it, is handling it right. She sees that you are angry, she sees that you are angry at her, she is asking you to face that, but in session she is NOT going to poke and prod and goad you into exploding. How therapeutic would that really be, for her to push you in that manner.
And if you say, I was SO mad, I think you weren't unfeeling in session! I think her sitting in silence with you DID make you mad like you said you wanted to do to you. Only you wanted her to do with words, rather than silence.....
I hope I haven't been offensive by talking straight here, but I really do think that was a productive session and your T is handling things with you right whether it feels good or not! I know it's hard to leave with big, hard, hurtful feelings, and I am sorry for that, but for me, the times after sessions like that have actually turned out to be more insightful and more like breakthroughs than the times I left feeling all at ease....