Thank you for all your great advice and help. I really do think im having these thoughts because of the things i have went through.

Too be honest i have never lost anyone that i have been really close to in my life, well that was untill i lost my dog of 17 years. I meen some people just say, o its a dog, but it wasn't like that for me. Im 18 years old, she had been around since i was 1. I didn't know what life was like without her, i guess i always pictured her being around forever to meet my kids. I was just a complete mess for a couple weeks and thats when the thoughts occured.

To make things worse, my best friend's Dad died suddenly and completely unexpectedly 3 weeks later. I had just begun to get better, and then bam i was attending the funeral of my best friends Dad, a guy i knew very well.

I still haven't told my parents yet, it has gotten alot better, we got a new puppy 4 weeks ago which has helped, but i stil lfind myself comparing her to my old dog. Which is unfair to her. I know i should see a therapist, but i dont want my parents to think im crazy.
I guess im kind of in a bind, but the thoughts have gone away for the past week or so, we will see what happens, i will keep you all updated.

Once again thanks alot for all the help.