Yes, that has bothered me. It bothers me that the t wouldn't be talking to me if I wasn't paying them.

Echoes (I think it was Echoes) had an interesting post where she said she's glad she's in a t relationship instead of a friend relationship with her t. I hadn't thought of it before, but I guess a t relationship can just be a different, but still real and legitimate relationship.

There is a nice story by Ellen Saks (sp?) about her life and one of her former t's dies in it. She actually did keep in touch with the t (a little) until the end of the t's life, just like you would in a non-t relationship. And Sak's ends her story with something sentimental about the t.