So....you are 19....extremely balanced in my opinion....very well spoken....realistic and aware of the many shaded hues coloring both your own motives ,and those of your mothers...and your lady friend.

I hear you saying that you live under your mothers roof and thus feel you may be answerable to her.In some regards...this is true.I have a son your age.He is the youngest of three boys.

Frankly this is my stance with him,although he lives here.

(Btw,he is attending college.)He is extremely independent,and very much possesses his own set views ...only compromising when 'the facts/circumstances' prove to him that a change of view is in order.

I have seen my son in situations that I disapproved of...worried about...cried over.Seen him wrap his heart around a girl who was so cunningly controlling...and manipulative.Seen him involve himself with friends that I wanted to send to alaska on his behalf.

There are things in a sons life where perhaps we need to evaluate...weigh the potential of harm of a permanent nature...and decide...what action is healthy...or dire.
As far as meds go...I see her concern,there are historically meds which can actually cause suicidal ideation among a host of other consequences.

But her position on that begins and ends with an ..."I love you...and because I do,I have researched this medication,and found the following things to be of concern.I want you to be cognizant and informed .Personally...I feel _____,______,_______."

Now if you were on meth,or an alcoholic or something of that nature and it was all robbing you of your potential and posed a threat of consequences ...ie,addiction,incarceration,brain damage,death,etc...I would stand on a soapbox and demand an intervention and it'd be me against the world on your behalf.Irregardless of what anyone thought.

Slapped you?I never,ever,once slapped my sons...ever...and they have done some things that may have begged it.What message does slapping a youth...ie,age 0-21.....send?...accomplish?....mean?....

You are capable of seeing the entire picture involving the dichotomy of the stance you take toward your mother and the rational,deeply honest view you have toward your lady friend.

But,I just feel that with these good feelings and values you see in your gf…that the relationship you have with her….irregardless of anyone elses views on it,are something that you've a right to indulge in…at your age…and in the development of your "relationship history".

I see that your family means a great deal to you…and I find it to be sooo valuable that you feel that way…have that…and enjoy it.But,that being said,there are boundaries in any relationship with any human outside your own physical body.In that….we all have lives to live.A history to create,our own choices to make,our own failures/successes to learn/grow from.With that in view…would it be right of you to exert a grandiose level of influence over any of your friends,mom,siblings…..choices for their lives?And if you did…where would their life-lessons begin and end?

I again realize it is your mothers home.She in fact has some bit of inalienable right perhaps,to say…I draw a line here or there as far as what I am comfortable with under my roof.Granted.However…that is where it ends.What you choose to do on your own time,aside from that which impacts the comfort level of others within your dwelling is your choice/right/say.

If your gf doesn't like your mum…can it be simply that she senses your mothers lingering eye over every breath she exudes?

Can she not comprehend that when you say…."I don't want to go live with gf…and have no intentions of doing so"….that your words are the truth?…If not,then why is that?Why doesn't your statement ring true to her when you say it?

You state…"possessive of me"…that's an astute observation .The entire thing resonates of an unhealthy degree of intrusion on your right to being a separate individual.All very freudian in fact.

If it all boils down to your mothers opinion being of such an importance to you…and you are fine with that…perhaps she can itemize all of what pleases /displeases her…and you can follow the format?IDK

"These glares"….do you give glares?…why should you get glares?…ugh…how annoying…jmo.

I want to say….I am UBER,SUPER,HUGELY….not trying to frustrate you with any of my views or statements…but you did post about all of it…and because I am a mum of a young man your age…whom I personally think is THE BEST person I ever met…..I was drawn to your circumstance and thereby compelled to answer…..therefore…you have it….my 2 cents.

Wolf p.s...your insight and interpretation far exceeds that of others your age...I am blown away!