I firmly believe my T does not want to cause me pain, ever. However, he sometimes pushes me to do things that he knows will cause pain, in an effort to relieve it (I'm thinking of some of the trauma-processing techniques we've done). I imagine this must be hard for him to do, because I don't think he likes seeing me in pain.

More importantly, he doesn't structure all his interactions with me to try to avoid accidentally hurting me. When I get hurt, as anyone does in a relationship with someone else, he is there to help me figure it out and understand that someone can hurt you, but it's not always intentional, and they can still care. I never knew that before.