You can not be both a "vulnerable client" and not have any unmet needs. Being vulnerable and wanting you needs to be met are the same thing.

You are clearly willing to talk about the unmet needs thing. But I think you are having some trouble with the vulnerability.

And unfortunately, I say this with the most respect, this is absolutely related to being male.

A female patient in love with a male therapist is culturally appropriate. Women are supposed to define themselves through relationships.

For a man if this happens it's some kind of gender death.

You don't like the idea of fixing things through talk, because it's too nonspecific. Can we turn that around? How would you propose that a therapist modulate a client's level of attraction? Through her tone of voice? Her clothing? What you are doing, proposing that your female therapist should have been more aware of herself as an object of desire, is already something our culture already requires.