I was feeling like that the first few months of therapy, Suratji. It IS so overwhelming. I agree with sunrise: some things build up and end up coming to the surface one way or another, no matter our awareness of it all. Maybe it's better that they come up in therapy, where it's safe to feel and address them. I've been running away from unpleasant emotions my entire life and therapy has helped “go through it, not around it”. Just a thought. Sending hugs and good vibes your way.