Thread: age
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Old Apr 05, 2011, 06:57 PM
Martin^^ Martin^^ is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2010
Posts: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by einundzwanzig View Post
...what is every 1s opinion on age difference in relationships? does it matter?
Depends what you both expect from the relationship, and if your expectations are compatible.
If you just want a short-term lover and you are both happy, then fine. You say you love him very much, though, so that hints at ambitions for something permanent.
There are issues about age in long-term relationships which must be faced if you are considering this as a life-long commitment. A gap of nearly three decades means that he may face health issues which may impact on your life also and it is more likely that he will become dependent on you than vice versa.
He will very likely die a long time before you, so you could become widowed in middle age - have you considered how would you handle the rest of your life at that point?
Do you want to have kids with him? How do you see that being affected by the age gap?
The problem for me is not with the relationship as such, but if you commit to this for years you may pass up the chance to meet men closer to your own age. An economist would call this an 'opportunity cost' - chances you sacrifice in order to take up a particular course of action. If the relationship breaks down later, you may find it more difficult to find another partner - as you get older, there are fewer single people to choose from (and some of those are unattached for good reason )
I would also wonder what baggage he brings from previous relationships - you might find yourself with stepchildren older than you.
Some relationships can overcome the challenges of age difference, but it is important to think carefully about the difficulties in advance.
Thanks for this!
notz