You're not alone, a lot of people experience it. :') (Generally before they learn more about the disorder)

I think it is important that you try to take care of yourself, though. If you are going the route of medicine, make sure you take it as prescribed. Therapists can help with emotional issues you may be experiencing. Trying to eat right and work out can significantly help your mood.

If you're not trying to take care of yourself, than you can only really blame yourself for allowing the disease to take hold. There are even holistic approaches that you can try to help your mood. What matters is that you're trying your best to get well and not using bipolar as an excuse, because it really isn't.

I spent 2 years in denial and attributed my bad behavior to being bipolar, when I could have easily stopped it by taking my medication as prescribed. I'm learning to accept the disorder as it is, and finally take care of myself. Sometimes I have med issues, but I'm trying. I hope you are too.