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I'm researching suicide methods on a newsgroup and reading posts made by people who need partners in "crime". A month ago I found about this place online but wasn't ready to start reading. (now I am?) I feel I'm inching ever closer to the "inevitable". But I have not hurt myself in any way, yet. I figure that I want to do it as efficiently as possible. Should I go to a hospital? How would they help me?
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The "inching closer to the inevitable" is what I was responding to. It does not seem like your treatment is working. We only have your words to go by.
I do not understand what you mean by suggesting you are not a good influence for this forum. I thought you were asking for help? You certainly may disregard anything we say while offering our support.
Be safe.