Thank you all for the support.

Isn't it weird how you do something thinking you're doing it for one reason and then after you've done it realise that wasn't the reason you were doing it at all? Or not the main reason anyway. After cancelling yesterday I realised that the main reason I didn't want to go was because I was worried I wouldn't be able to go back after the break and I was feeling cut-off from all my issues and a little bit from t so it seemed like it would be less painful not to go and risk getting re-connected to t/my issues and then possibly not being able to go back after the break I spoke to my t yesterday and she has changed my session to a different day at an earlier time which will hopefully make it a little easier to go when she gets back because I won't have nearly the whole day to worry and stress myself out about it. Now I just hope I can get myself to go back after a 3 week (well 4 weeks including this last week) break. I'm literally just worried about a 10 minute car ride, not the session itself. It's such a tiny part of my week and yet it stresses me out all week