Thanks for the support everyone.

Re: taking care of others' feelings. I have a really good grasp on this pattern in myself, thanks to my work with oldT. I know I am HIGHLY HIGHLY sensitive, hypervigilent to others' emotions, thanks to years of abuse by my mother. I've learned ways to identify when I'm feeling old feelings/fears vs. present day.

I think in this case, while I may be extra sensitive to caretaking newT, I think there is very real "stuff" going on that I just can't get around.

I just talked to my best friend on the phone for an hour....I talk to her every day (she lives in my old home town, where i moved from last year). I asked her to tell me what her impression is of my therapy experience these past few months and she said I've been doubtful the WHOLE time. She said her impression is that T is a really good, compassionate person, but she's just not getting it right with me. Her style is just not what I need right now.

I agree. I emailed newT and told her I'd like to take a break from therapy and focus more on the present for a while. I'd tell her in person, but our next appt is 2-hours long and I don't want to take that whole time away from another client who could really use it.

Why is this so hard??