Yes, it is the ex-wife that is using meth. She has been doing it for quite some time now but there is no proof. She was doing it when my ex-boyfriend was married to her and she had other children from a previous marriage. The older kids got fed up with her drug abuse and neglect and went to live with their dad. The first husband requested a drug test be done but I guess there is some kind of shampoo that masks the meth and she passed the test. She didn't fight for her kids at all. She let them go live with dad and she hasn't seen them since.

While going through the divorce, my boyfriend was caught up in his alcohol addiction and got in trouble with the law. It was during the custody determination so he got his child on the typical every other weekend and holidays ruling that most dad's get. He has been clean and sober for many years now and would have many high-quality character references if needed.

Our main issue is we are concerned for the safety of the child. We've talked to CPS, a child custody evaluator, a lawyer, etc. about the situation and we've been told there really isn't anything that can be done at this point. There needs to be a "smoking gun."

The ex seems to be getting deeper and deeper into her disease and the child says the mom is up all night many times and the ex says she is doing paperwork (she's on welfare and doesn't work) or at the other end of the spectrum she sleeps all day and tells the child her meds are off. We don't know if she takes meds or not or what for so we don't truly know that part of the situation. My boyfriend has asked the child if they are safe and if they need to come live with him but the child has said no in the past. As things seem to be going downhill with the ex and her situation (afraid to post too many details but it's bad) the child did say she wanted to come live with my boyfriend.

The child is still young and very loyal to the mother, but we do get snippets of the bad environment and bizarre behavior of the mother. The mom treats her as an adult and displays poor parenting choices like exposure to inappropriate media and much more. It's very upsetting. The child is extremely good looking and intelligent and has tons of potential to make a better life than the mother is modeling. In addition to that, we fear the safety issues an long-term ill-effects that may come out of living in this environment.

I've posted on another forum and everyone else says get a lawyer. We have one and we've talked to all the right people but we keep getting the same answer nothing can be done at this point just be ready for the ex to fall apart.

Does anyone have any other advice? I keep looking for the missing link or story of someone that has gone through and has a personal story or input. I don't want to just wait it out, but if that's what we have to do that's what we will do. Thanks so much for listening to the story.