Take it one step at a time...do you have any hobbies or something that interests you? Maybe take a one-time class/workshop in something your interested in and see how it goes. It will take some time to unlearn what you were taught so be patient with yourself. I think you are just behaving the way you were "trained" to behave by your mother and the only way to break from the "lessons" stuck in your head would be to actively go against them. Be patient with yourself...it took a long time for you to reach this point so it will not change overnight. I think if you try to be social one baby step at a time you will be able to defeat those negative thought processes. And each success will give you confidence to go on to the next. I know it's tough...hang in there though, okay?