T shares bits of his life with me. He didn't early in therapy...I made it VERY clear that I needed him to be this guy who just sat in that office 24/7. I wasn't ready for him to be a "real" person, at all.

But over the years, things have changed. He tells me little stories from his life (mostly from his history) when they tie into what we're talking about and when he thinks they will help. I know little tidbits about what goes on with his daughter, who is the same age as my youngest son. We talk about spirituality a lot, so I know a lot about his spiritual beliefs/practices.

When I used to need to get grounded, I would ask T to "tell me a story". And he would. He never told me anything inappropriate or too personal, but he always, always told me a story, and it helped.

I had a minister when I was in high school who was supposed to counsel me and he used ME for counselling - I knew way, way, way too much inappropriate stuff about his life...and the boundaries were blurred and then they disappeared and the outcome was not good.

So. I love T, and I love knowing little things about him, and I've learned to trust over the years that he won't tell me "too much". He has good boundaries and I appreciate that. A lot.