(((((allme))))) I am sorry it took so long for me to check in with you. Family issues are never easy to resolve. And pushing family back can be a hard thing to do. Even when you know how sick the pressure is make you. I hope you are able to find the calm you need to bring the anger and anxiety down to a manageable level.

Giving your brother a 2 month time limit is a very positive move don't you think? When you have moments of doubt he will be able to get on his feet within that time you will need to be careful you don't cave. You will be doing him a favour in the long run.

I had a cousin come to crash here for awhile. I let her sleep and sit around all day for a couple of weeks. I knew she was coming down from a drug bing and sleeping a lot was probably the best thing for her. Once the drugs had worn off I told her I could not afford to feed her and buy her cigarettes and while she was welcome to stay she would need to get a job and pull her weight with house chores. There would be no drugs and no late nights on the internet.

She didn't even wait a day before she found someone with a couch to sleep on to come and get her. It was her choice to be a cough surfer instead of getting her life on track. I loved her too much to let her mooch. Her dad had enabled her that way for years until the family convinced him he wasn't doing her any favours. She did finally get it together when she ran out of places to crash.

It might be a good idea to consider the suggestion people have offered. Asking your husband to take the reigns with monitoring the 2 month stay and giving you some space while you attend to your needs. Your husband deserves to see some stability in his own life. He can't in the current climage.

Perhaps he can even speak with your dad and ask him to give you some space. It is more then okay allme. It sounds like it is critical right now for you to be honest with yourself and ask for some help and support to get out from under the pressures being imposed on you by your family. You must come first and your family most honour that or you will need to cut them out for a while.

No decision you make on behalf of your own wellness is permanent. You are not abandoning anyone. You are holding on to your life and your marriage. If they can't respect that then you really have no choice but to back them off or give your husband the reigns to do it for you.

You want your marriage. You want your health. Don't let anyone compromise that. It will not serve anyone's interests for you to to get sicker then you are now by trying to cope under the conditions you are in. You aren't coping. You are getting sicker. Everyone will loose if you are not given the space to recover. No one more than you.

May you find the peace you need to find some stability in your days. My thoughts and prayers are with you hun.