Hey guys thanks for all the replies

Just to answer a few people's questions - I see my current T privately as actually seeing someone on the NHS for even 1 year or 6 months is almost impossible.
Although at the same time there's not that many private therapists in my area of the uk either.

My T works from a person centred/ intergrative type theory - not CBT.

Sittingatwatersedge - I have big abandonmnent issues but no one that I have ever seen has said the wouldn't abandon me, so it just keeps happening and it reinforces my fear of abandonment and rejection. T are too worried about dependancy to say things like that.

xxxx