Like Qwerty, I've been so busy thinking about my T's boundaries that I've never even considered whether I have any of my own. Thinking about it now, I don't think that I do. I have boundaries with other people, certainly, but now with my T. I feel safe and comfortable with her, and can't think of anything she would realistically do that would cross a boundary with me. Reading kitten's post about handing T the check, however, got me thinking about handing my T my check. I've felt awkward before about touching T's hand while giving her the check, but not because it crosses MY boundary-- because I'm afraid (probably irrationally) that it might be crossing HER boundary. In fact, I feel that way in general about "accidental" touch. Unlike a hug, it isn't planned, anticipated, asked for or agreed to-- so it feels like "oops, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I hope I didn't invade your personal space." Guess that's my issue, though. Granted, there are also some people I don't want to touch; I guess there are people who are inside my touch bubble and people who are outside of it (T being inside of it).

But, moving away from physical boundaries, I sort of wish my T would push me or challenge me to move beyond my boundaries in terms of what I talk about/work through in therapy. I'm not really sure what my boundaries are-- if there are things I'm avoiding-- but I'd like her to push me to figure them out. But I'm not sure what that would look like. Since I can't picture it, I don't know how to ask for it. If I try, now, to push myself to envision what it would look like, I guess it would be a series of questions-- like shooting questions at me that I've never thought of before and having me answer them on the spot. I feel like that would make me open up more, and eventually hit on a point of resistence-- hit on something I didn't know I needed to talk about. But how do you ask for something like that? Ts don't exactly have a book of insightful, personal questions to read from...