I'm just curious. I'm having a little trouble understanding the situation. Maybe it's because I'm a girl and only have one sister, no brothers.

What exactly upsets you? You said this was his sister, correct? I know that when my sister and I shared a bathroom, if one of us needed to brush their teeth while the other was in the shower, we didn't question it. We'd open the door, say "Don't mind me!" and we both went about our business. Not having a brother, I can't say whether or not my opinion on that matter would change at all.

I do find the foot rub a little weird, but that's more to do with me finding foot rubs weird by themselves. I don't like the idea of my fiance giving me one.

I also don't think my fiance would think twice about walking around in his boxers in front of his sister. And I can't say it would bother me.

Do you believe that your boyfriend is having an incestuous affair with his sister?

Are you and your boyfriend from the same culture? Perhaps there are other factors playing into how they interact.

I'm not trying to dismiss your feelings or worries, not in the least. I'm only trying to understand what you're saying more fully. If something upsets you, I believe you should be able to tell your boyfriend, discuss the manner calmly, and be able to come to a compromise. It bothers me more that he isn't willing to listen to your feelings and try to work through them with a therapist. The fact that he simply tries to pin everything on you, instead of trying to see your point of view, and then refuses to let you leave him is far more upsetting to me.

I think you should consider seeing a therapist for yourself if you are not already. I'm worried about your self esteem. Right now your feelings are not being validated, and I know that can be hard on one's self-worth. Only if you're secure in yourself will you be able to take complete care of yourself and do what is necessary to make yourself happy, which is far more important than what may or may not be going on with your boyfriend and his sister.

Good luck and remember to take care of yourself!