The horrific migraine I had dissipated...and made a return with a vengeance today, on the day of my session with T.

T knows how bad of a time I'm having with it, and he knows my will for life is dwindling. My fantasies involve using a titanium spork to gouge the areas of pain in my head and neck. I see my neurologist tomorrow morning, and T asked if I could sign a release so he could talk to my neurologist. I told him I would.

T then went on to say that he feels I need a team approach to handle this situation and that he believes me being admitted into the hospital would be beneficial.

It wasn't a productive session at all because I was just in so much pain. I didn't feel like talking much.

And now T is going away so I won't be seeing him for 3 weeks.

UGH.

I'll be ok. I am ok. And if I sink into that pit of despair, I know I have my PC friends...and I can always imagine my T being here with me, and refer to his signs of caring. They are always with me. I just need to be able to access them.