Jeez Louise, you're hard on yourself! YOU GOT TO A POINT IN YOUR THERAPY WHERE YOU WERE ABLE TO TAKE A BREAK FROM IT! That's is HUGE!!
So you feel now that you've had enough break and you need to go back.
There's no 'failure' there, hon. That's simply knowing yourself, taking care of yourself, making the best decisions for you at any given time, and having the flexibility to revise those decisions on an as-needed basis.