ok, so i am trying to use my words right since i have a hard time with them. personally me, i have social phobia and recovering agoraphobic, i do not understand people and the world , but finding someone similair to me has helped me a lot.
(very brief summary of me without getting too indepth)

ok on to relation, my mother was very similiar to you, she didn't understand people, she couldn't (no just didn't want to) she couldn't have fun because she didn't know how to go about it. the emotion just wasn't there. it wasn't taught to her.
she saw compassion but it was hard for her to show it, work is what she knew and did, everything else was errelavant.
growing up her parent spair her no mind, she was a girl, useless, unlike her brothers. girls were only good for making babies and that was it, as well seen but not heard.

it wasn't until her late 40's that she found a "play mate" it took so much heartache to get there but she found someone soooooo unlike her and they did stuff she would NEVER do. it didn't last long, but i do believe it last an impression. than after that she found someone else who drew her in to this whole other culture and she saw and experienced things i had already in the first 13 years of my life! (a lot more to her story but it only dwells on the mistreatment of her past and i don't want to dwell especially since she has passed)

guess what i'm trying to say is i hear your struggles and frustration in your post, and there might be a lot more to come before things get better, things can fall into place, i don't know when, or how, but if they did for one person it could for another.

sorry if it's not the best advice ever i'm only good with examples and relation when it comes to people.