I used to think that how you feel is your decision and all that positive lying to yourself stuff. That's what it feels like. Telling yourself all these positive things and looking happy on the outside but underneath feeling so dead and in so much pain. I was kidding myself.
It's just hard when people that I look up to don't understand. Then it makes me question myself and I feel guilty. They are so hard and insensitive sometimes. But when they are like that they start losing my respect, and I am beginning to see them through clear glasses rather than through my rose coloured glasses. They are not so 'all knowing' as I thought they were. I actually understand something that they don't have any idea about. Then I see how narrow minded they really are. I get annoyed when people address a major problem with a simple answer. If that answer doesn't work they conclude that something must be wrong with you.