Quote:
Originally Posted by sunrise
Suratji, why are you feeling that it isn't possible? Have you tried really hard to change and haven't been able to? You've posted that you are feeling different since starting therapy--feeling a lot of feelings you hadn't felt before, etc. That is change and progress. I don't see you describing that you go to therapy week after week and just sit there ever the same and see no change. You sound like there is a lot of movement going on inside of you. I am surprised that you think change is not possible because it doesn't match what you have described for your therapy so far. You're only a few months into therapy and a ton has been stirred up! You're feelings things from the past that you had stuffed away. You are experiencing a strong attachment to your T (or at least it has sounded like that). All of these are changes and movement. I don't see evidence in your posts that change is not possible for you! 
Good luck at your session. |
I've had a roller coaster emotional experience since the last session on 4/6 but it has been supremely amazingly productive personally. You're right - there is a lot of movement and it has been tough to handle. The emotions without an apparent cause were driving me batty.
But, the powerful step in therapy called 'attachment' and also the process called 'transference' have happened to me. What is so great about those is that now I'm able to work with these emotions because they're projected onto my T. There is a concreteness that allows me and T a way to get to the bottom of stuff.
Reading so many books and articles about these processes have been so enlightening. If I had read those 6 months ago there is no way I could have understood how it was possible to become attached to a stranger nor could I have imagined projecting my issues onto a stranger. To now know that I am 'textbook' is mind blowing. I am allowing the healing process to move forward by recognizing and even encouraging my own emotions towards T to be felt.
In the past 5 days I have made giants leaps in self-understanding and only because of 'attachment' and 'transference'. But knowing more clearly my issues will not be enough. The next step is learning to regulate the emotions and that is done by practice with my T.
I am so excited and so happy that I believe now for a certainty that change is possible. But it's painful and it's extremely hard work that requires lots of focused attention. I've been too lazy and complacent in the past to follow through but now I'm committed. This process is not for cowards or weaklings.