Well, I e-mailed T, and we are meeting on Friday morning for an hour. I just need to check in and see where I'm at, if I want to go back, if I want to continue the break.

My mom is in end-stage alcoholism and her symptoms are starting to really scare me. I am her only caregiver. She's only 62, but healthwise, she is like my 88 year old grandma. I'm afraid she's going to die soon...and my entire life has been about KEEPING. HER. ALIVE. so it's a lot. I think I need to be taken care of for a minute while I sort through this.

My life is just very chaotic right now for various reasons, and I'm having trouble finding some quiet space to just be. I know that that can totally spiral me downward...it spiraled me down so much once that I almost ended up in the hospital...so I want to be aware of it and try to pull myself out of it before it's too deep.

I *know* from experience that sometimes the smallest shift starts things moving in a better direction. So, I am open and waiting for the shift, and looking forward to seeing T on Friday.

Thanks for checking on me