I guess I just didn't know what to expect. We've both been out of work for a while so we both had down time and time to mess around and that was fun while it lasted, but I started freaking out a bit about the financial side of things and knew I needed to work harder on the job hunt so I've recently been pushing really hard to get a job. He hasn't lifted a finger to find work and seems pretty content with his unemployment check. I did get into a space with questioning things when I was talking with a friend that is very much into labels, degrees, salaries, etc. and it did make me feel a bit pressured that my boyfriend wasn't even looking or anything and it did make me feel a bit pressured that he doesn't have a degree, high salary etc as we live in a very affluent community and housing is expensive. But then again, my ex-husband was very driven and affluent but he was a micromanager and emotionally inept. My boyfriend is very supportive, loving and caring. I don't expect him to make as much money as I do, but of course I want him to work and not sit on the couch and watch the news all day and sleep in until 9:30 or 10 every morning.

I am a real people person and have been in committed relationships over half my life. I feel happier and more stable when I'm with someone and do enjoy the teamwork aspect of a relationship too.

I have some issues with self-esteem, abandonment, mental illness, etc. so I have my flaws. With my illness there will be ups and downs so dare I be so judgemental about my boyfriend's struggles or traits so to say.

I do love him dearly but I guess I will have to see what happens as our relationship progresses and if I can live with the issues or not. I tell my girlfriend if I could take the drive from my ex and the heart of my boyfriend I'd be set with everything I want. My boyfriend is a special person and a few people mentioned that there are peope out there that are caring and driven as well. I'm a bit of a skeptic. I did a fair amount of dating about a year after my divorce until I met my current boyfriend 3 years later and I didn't find that I had physical chemistry with many of the men I dated. There was one that I talked to on the phone and we corresponded as well and everything sounded good and looked good on "paper" but he was not attractive at all. I didn't want to be rude and leave on the spot. I don't want to break up with him as I love him, but I don't know if I can live with things the way there are so stagnant and no progress whatsoever. I received from very good feedback so I think I will work with what I have right now and not go back into that dating cesspool again.