Quote:
Originally Posted by AnaBabo
Oh, wow, I feel kind of cool because you assumed I'm older and living with him... I'm taking it as a compliment, haha... Um, no, I'm 15. My boyfriend is 16. I don't know how that changes things, except that we live separately and we're not sleeping together (yet- that actually might change soon... but that's another story...). Um... He's not always like how he was in that conversation. It's just when I press him. I love him and usually he's extremely sweet and loving. I'm willing to work on him with whatever macho stuff he wants. He's just like that, and I don't really mind... I do want to build a life with him. I know that's asking a lot of a high school relationship but... Let me have my fantasies, haha... We're going to go to California together when we're 18... I'm going to be a teacher and he doesn't know what he wants to be yet... But.. the point is, I could never leave him. I love him. And he loves me. Even if in the middle of a fight I ask him if he wants space he'll immediately cool down and ask me not to leave him. He's really very sweet, I'm sorry I didn't really portray that correctly.
And I respect you a lot for your opinion. I mean, you seem really independent and logical and I admire that. I will mention about how his issues are mine now too, and that it does hurt me that he isn't able to talk about them. Thank you. That's a really smart thing to say.
And thank you to your PS... That does make me feel a lot better... I know it's private and a great community... I guess I needed to be reminded of that...  |
You are so young to be dealing with all of this. I thought you were older as well.
You said it's been a month now - have you only been dating a month? That's not a very long time - maybe you need to take a break till he can get his sleep together - teenagers actually need more sleep than adults
Your boyfriend has experienced something extremely traumatic and without help he is only going to get worse....time heals many things, but I'm not sure it will help something like that....and you mentioned his temper...if he's not hurting you, what is he apologizing about? Even if he's just yelling at you, it's still abuse and you shouldn't stand for it.
I know you love him. I remember my first love at 15 and how intense it was but your boyfriend needs help and if he's not willing to get it its going to affect his grades, how he acts all the time...your boyfriend needs some serious help that you are not equipped to give him. LazyLogophile is right, this isn't just his problem if he's in a relationship with you, plus he's living with his parents I'm assuming.....
Bottom line - you are doing the right thing by asking for help and asking him to get help. If he doesn't want to get help then you might have to step back for a little while till he realizes he needs it. He's too young to be dealing with this on his own and so are you.
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