If I were in your situation, I think I would try to change my main focus to other or new aspects of my life besides health, fitness, and "look". It sounds like you are doing well there but what we focus on is. . . what we focus on. If you have a flaw and "pick" at it, then it can only get worse? You did not mention what you do for a living, or even as much personal information as you gave about your boyfriend's ex! I know she is a painter but I don't have any information like that about you?

When my husband "complains" about some aspect of our relationship or a personal "flaw" I look at it and see what I can do as an actual behavior. I walk and eat too fast so now I am working to make myself "stop" or come back and walk beside him instead of surging ahead or slow down my eating so I don't finish before him and eat more as a result of the boredom of just sitting and waiting for him to finish.

But it sounds like you are doing all the right things with your body; it just "is" a certain way right now. I don't know if you are also worried about the future/aging and when it will really go downhill (I'm 60 and 115 pounds overweight and that combination is NOT pretty :-) but there are some things that can't be helped; stretch marks from babies and how tall you are, for example

I would not necessarily try to work on how you feel about your body directly; I would just work on not comparing it to other people's at first? I was amused, looking to see if you mentioned whether your boyfriend's ex- had stretch marks or not :-) but stop with the behavior of comparisons. Work to catch yourself at it and then stop and redirect your thinking. Eventually it will get so you don't "go" there in the first place and so the "pain" of a negative comparison won't be there either. Think of it like one does the don't-think-about-pink-elephants example. You have to think about pink elephants when someone tells you not to, whether you "want" to or not because it is "there". Get it so you don't compare your body with other women's and I think you will feel much better about yourself, when you do think about yourself? You have that desire, you used it when you were talking about the work of having a baby and having the scars to show for it. That's the "true" You!