I know that this may not be received well, but let me start off by saying that every problem is real to whomever struggles with it and I am not trying to invalidate anyone.

Having said that, I have noticed a trend when I speak to people, and view many posts on this site, that someone who has been diagnosed with a disorder will tend to bring it up before speaking about their problem. It seems as though it's almost a blame shift, like "I have no personal responsibility for how I handle my feelings, because I have a disorder". I recognize that this is not the case with everyone, but I see a general trend and it makes me curious. Someone once told me (in face to face conversation) that they just couldn't help but be depressed all the time because it was part of their disorder. "It's just the way I am, I can't help it." I understand that might be the way you respond to things RIGHT NOW, but that doesn't mean that you have to be that way.

For example, I have struggled with depression my whole life and even have the diagnosis of more than one therapist on more than one occasion that I have BPD and clinical depression. They put me on several anti depressants, but I was never on them for long. I just didn't like the idea that because my personality didn't fit into some Fruedian definition of normal, that I had to take drugs. Frued had his own issues. The guy was a cocaine addict! Why does his opinion of me matter? Do I get depressed sometimes...hell yes! Do I have issues that need to be worked on? Of course! Who doesn't? Can anyone claim to be completely healthy? Is that even possible in the world of psychology? It's all so subjective.

I feel like a lot of people use their disorder as an excuse to just accept defeat, rather than work on overcoming the psychological obstacles that are impeeding their ability to be more satisfied with their life. Again, I am not invalidating disorders, or saying they aren't real, but I get the impression with a lot of people that they are using it as a justification for their actions or the way they respond to the people around them and difficult situations that naturally arise during the course of their life. I feel like a diagnosis is meant to enlighten a person to certain behavioral patterns that are undermining their ability to deal with situations in a positive way. I see many people who ARE using their diagnosis as a method of self-improvement, rather than as their unchangeable identity. What worries me are the people who claim that this is just the way they are and that it is up to others to adjust to them. I don't know if that is really beneficial. Even if you convince loved ones and friends that they have to treat you a certain way so as not to aggravate your symptoms, is that really helping? Shouldn't you be challenging yourself to overcome this "disorder" by excersizing your ability to control the way you react to things by changing unhealthy patterns of thought?

I also want to acknowledge that medication works for many people, and just because I didn't find it helpful doesn't mean that someone else won't. My PERSONAL belief, and I say belief because I am no doctor and I have my own issues clouding my judgment, is that in the case of almost any disorder there is no "magic pill" that will make you feel better about yourself or change your behavior for you. That is up to you. Therapy is a great way to do this because you can work through your issues with someone who is objective and has no alterior motives other than to see you healthy and happy at the end of your treatment.

I hope this mammoth rambling is received the way I intended, as a post based just on curiosity. It's just some thoughts, and nothing more. I'm interested to see if anyone else sees things the same way, or can point out where I am missing the point or maybe there are aspects that I'm not taking into consideration...

Thanks to anyone who replies.