Hey. I'll add a bit too...

If people post a lot when they are in distress (and their distress is frequent) then that can be hard not just for other people, but for that person as well. Because if other people start to feel frustrated because they don't know what to do to help then they tend to take their frustration out on the person. If you think someone is 'crying wolf' then you tend to feel frustrated with them. But the sad fact is there really was a wolf because they are only expressing how they feel and they are genuinely distressed.

But back to your extreme...

> If I don't post at all when my world is crumbling....... how can I get support???

Indeed. How will people know you need support? People don't post for a variety of reasons. Sometimes it is as Greenleaves said; people are having things go well IRL and / or are really busy IRL and so they aren't spending much time online in general.

> It's the extremes that aren't so good --isn't it!

I really do think so.

> I guess I need to get beyond the dysfunctional coping patterns--(but that's way easier said than done)

Yes indeed it is. And knowing 'rationally' what one *should* do and having ones feelings follow suit can be two quite seperate things.

But you know you have taken the first step already: You started this thread.

And...

You are hurting.
((((((Mandy))))))
That didn't come through so clearly...
But are you having a hard time of it now?
I think that is what you are getting at but I'm not so sure whether that is it or whether you are just wondering about this more abstractly...

Are you okay?