Quote:
Originally Posted by sittingatwatersedge
dear Granite this is so hard 
a child does need to trust; a child is very much aware of its own inability to care for itself, its limitations in size and strength and understanding etc. So it knows that to survive, it needs the support and protection of another.
That doesn't mean that the child does trust; BUT to survive, the child knows that it has to get that support and protection no matter what the cost.
This can mean that the child will bend the facts, however far they have to be bent, in order to be able to say to itself, I am supported, I am protected. Bending can be in the form of colossal denial, ignoring bad things that happen, or making excuses for the caregiver(s), or even... when the ugly facts can't be denied, turning the blame for them onto oneself... which is toxic and lasting.
Sometimes I don't express myself very well, do you understand what I am trying to say? |
this makes sense to me, sawe, and I think it's a deep thought/insight.....it's not trust, per se, but simple survival and maybe even a sort of unwilling dependency, dependent but without trust.....without the love and affection along with the caretaking, how can there be a true, deep trust given to the caretaker? I don't know......I think babies realize when the care given them is given with love and that helps them form good trust/dependency/secure attachment.....