((Rose 76))

I have been inpatient a few times in my life. Once, as a teenager. And twice as an adult (a few years ago).

Each time, I wasn't real excited about my admission, but I did enter myself in each case. I always had to stay longer than orginally intended, but I also know that my case is complex. Finding more solid ground takes me some time, tears, and hard work. that's just the way that it is.

I don't have any hard feelings towards going inpatient. Sometimes, that needs to be done to ensure that you won't find the way to end it all. And when you are seriously considering options and consequences, you need some help to get out of that state of mind.

It's always nice to "click" with other patients ~ to have that support and camraderie. It helps reassure that some people in this world actually do like you. You aren't completely worth the self-hate that you may grip onto tightly. (I do that. )

I would recommend going into the hospital with the expectation that you will get out when the doctors start seeing some solid improvement in your general mood and perspective towards life (in general). When doctors see that you can maintain self-control, despite triggers being present. Generally, that's a sign that you will be able to have more independence in your daily life and trust that you won't freak at the slightest trigger.

That is my personal experience & knowledge that I've gained through my time spent in mental hospitals. I have been in a few different mental hospitals, and some are better than others too. Mayo Clinic was wonderful for me! That was most home-like, and comfortable. A county hospital in Ca (that I went to as a teen) sucked!! Very low income patients, some of them psychopathic. All of us in one room. I sure as heck wouldn't recommend going to a hospital like that again. Last, was more in the middle. I didn't have the luxuries or the freedom that I had at Mayo. I was kind of being treated as a child, in some ways. (Which I didn't like.) But, as I improved, the behavior of the staff also improved towards me.

Gentle hugs to you honey ~ very best wishes!