Well to reply to the last posters...
First, I don't nag him about having sex, that used to be an issue, he did finally open up & say that it was making him even more uninterested. So I backed off..only once in a blue moon will I say anything about it now. Now it is more of a joking thing, like on New Years Day, I joked & sayed that..."We haven't had sex all year", now he laughed about that & we both thought it was funny, but I do not harm on him at all cause I know that it is hard to get into something that you are *****ed about all the time.

We have talked about compromise, actually we discussed it again last night. When I got home from dinner with my parents, I sat down at the computer & asked him to read this whole thread. When he got through I sat him down on the couch next to me with the tv off. I told him I was sorry for making him read all this, he hates reading, & I knew he was tired & that I was sorry for making our relationship public, but that I needed some advise from others & needed to put my thought into words.

Well I asked him how he felt about it all & he sayed I am sorry...I told him sorry wasn't going to get us through this or help the situation, I need real words & thoughts. I didn't get a whole lot out of him but I felt better for letting him know exactly how I felt. Basicly he said that he is just exhusted from work, which I can understand, the man gets up at 4am, so by the time I get home & we have dinner he has been up for well over 12 hours. So he says he just isn't in the mood to do anything. I understood but still didn't like the answer totaly, I didn't see why he felt the need to pleasure himself without ever thinking about me. Mostly I got a lot of "I don't knows", which I said was not good enough, he knows words, he is not stupid & I don't care if it doesn't make perfect sence, hell he doesn't even have to make complete sentences if he doesn't want to, something, anything would be great. I told him that no matter how small or big anything was that was on his mind, he needed to tell me, I know just getting things off your chest makes you feel a lot better than if you keep it all on your shoulders. So he promised he would try..I said I had heard that before, he said I have been, then looked at me & said ok I haven't been trying enough & that he would really try. I asked if our relationship was worth it & he said yes...so I told him to show me. We have said that we will both try that on the weekends we will make an honest effort to really spend some US time, I told him even if we have sex once a week, I will be happy...would I like it more, yes...but something is better than nothing. So if he truly shows me he will make an honest effort twice a month, i will do the rest. We have decided we will read stories together on line, share fantasies & just be who we were in the begining of our relationship.

This is not the first attempt at this, but I hope he & I both really try to make it happen. I still want to seek out a professional to try & get to what is underlying all his pent up emotions, I think there is more to it than he or I will ever know. I feel a little better now, but things will take time.

Thank you all for your insight & listening! Any other thoughts or suggestions would be wonderful!