hi granite,
i like your journal. between each session i write in my journal to t about stuff i think and feel and my reactions to the last session. i had a rule for self that i had to just write honestly without thinking about how t would react to the written stuff. and the 2nd rule was that i had to give t the journal each session no matter what. i guess in the session i distanced myself from the journal and refused to remember what was written in it when i handed it to him. using it like this has been a huge part of my healing. good luck with yours.
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