I feel a little strange about trying to find a T...

I feel like people here won't like me if I don't get a T and that is the reason why I want to get a T...so people will like me.

Feeling this makes me want to rebel and not get counselling.

I feel like I want people to accept who I am. I feel upset when people don't want to be my friend unless I change....like there is something so horribily wrong with me that makes me unlovable.

So I'm conflicted. It feel like I'm giving in if I get do what people tell me to. It feels like I have to lose my identity in order for others to like me.

I dunno...starting to get a little upset again.

I just wish...I just wish that people will like me whether or not I decide to get help. I wish people could like me just the way I am.