I hear you Lexicon- i wonder the same, if my mother hadn't left me would i be in the state i am in now?
But even if she hadn't, my reletives would have still died, and would i have been affected by that as greatly without having already been abandoned by my mother?

There are all sorts of other things i could ask, all sorts of other situations, life events etc that i've suffered, and who knows what the outcome would be?

And then there's that point of individual differences, and how different situations can create different effects for different people; and just through development and dealing with these situations in turn, i might might have been just as distraught over something simple later on purely because i'd not suffered a crisis before.

It's all too diverse to explain and categorize.

If you think you have a mental illness, and you're okay with that, then that's cool. If you don't think you have a mental illness, despite whatever judgements are made on you, then that's cool too.

I know i'm quite terrified of applying for jobs and having to mention previous problems- which you have to do else they'd be asking what the hell i've been doing with myself for the past few years... but it is part of the 'equal opputunities' scheme in employment now and on par with skin colour. Even though i know they can't discriminate for having a mental illness, i still sometimes feel like it's a black mark against my name.

I guess it's down to your own opinion, and whether you think having a 'mental illness' is sucha terrible thing?