it also might have been that you "broke him in" with regard to counselling. It's like how the oldest kid was the badass that always shocked the parents, but by the time the youngest hits his/her teens, the parents are used to what was previously "bad" behavior and lets the kid do whatever he/she wants.

The g/f might also be better at blaming him than you were. You suffered from 18+ years of him chipping away at your self-esteem. He hasn't done as much damage to hers in the mere 2 years that they have been together.

That would be my guess, anyway...