I can't wait for the counselling place to get back to me. I keep thinking that I didn't leave a clear enough message or something and maybe they couldn't get my number or something.

I really need to work on changing my behaviour. I need to make sure I'm always civil and I have to reassure people that I won't harm myself ever.

I'm a little afraid to go back after 4 weeks because i don't want to be blocked for 8 weeks. I have to make sure I've got the rules down. I have to practice. Maybe I should run my posts by someone before posting it. I really don't want to ever get blocked again.

Maybe I should stay here for a while. I'm making new friends here. I'm making a new history here. I'll be a dual citizen.

I need a lot of help to make sure i never break the rules again. Will someone help me?