I've tried thinking about it, and not thinking about it. I've tried distracting and distracting and distracting. I've tried drugs and alcohol and cutting and I've tried talking about it and I've tried ignoring it. I've tried sleeping and eating and not sleeping and not eating. I am running myself into the ground. I have used every dbt skill I know. If I wasn't so resistant I would pick up my dbt binder and see if there is something I forgot, but I don't want to do that because seeing the binder reminds me of T and that makes me angry.