Quote:
Originally Posted by LydiaB
I did warn him. I told him "don't get too close to me" I said it. I told him "you can't fix me", but he told me he could. He took my words as a challenge and not advice, and look where we are now. I told him so. I told him this would happen. But he led me into it. He told me something else. He said he was there for me. He promised. He told me to trust him. FOR WHAT?! So he can turn around and leave also!? Just like the rest of them. He told me I was going to get better. He told me he was there for me. He was so upset when he realized he had only been talking to one of the many. He called us liars. Told us we were ego states. Told us to forget about it. Wanted to shut up what was already silent. He said things like "We work so well together" and then told me I was delusional when I told him he would hurt me. He said things like "I feel like I have to protect you" and favored us above the rest of his clients. He wouldn't let us talk to anyone else. Took over all the positions in our lives. I tell him he's awful. I tell him he's a predator. I tell him what I think of him, because no one else will.
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wow. I want to say that when I read this all I could think of was how unprofessional, unethical and hurtful he is as a Therapist, there are so many red flags in what you have said here.
A Therapist should
NEVER promise a client they
definately will get better or that the therapist can "fix" them...that is totally wrong! No one can promise someone that and to say this to someone vulnerable is very unfair. A therapist can hold hope and offer to support you to hopefully improve things for yourself but not offer promises.
You say he got "upset" when he found out he was talking to one of many - A therapist should not be getting upset over what a client is disclosing to them as their issues, worries, fears, realities etc. Getting upset affects the client, perhaps inducing guilt for upsetting their therapist, shame or emabarrassment over what they have said which could stop them from opening up to the Therapist again...an endless list of negative impacts!! A therapist is meant to stay as neutral and objective as possible and help the client explore things. Also calling a client a liar is a big no-no!!
Can you explain what you mean when you say that he "wouldn't let us talk to anyone else. He took over all the positions in our lives"? This sentence really concerns me.
You have done nothing wrong by seeking help and trusting in someone who is supposed to have your best interests in mind! Please don't blame yourself because you opened up and told the truth in therapy. If you can't tell your therapist the truth then your not with the right therapist because your Therapy sessions is theone place your supposed to be able to tell the truth, be yourself or yourselves and be accepted. You are not at fault!
You all deserve big safe hugs!
