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I completely agree with online_user. Granted, I am myself a "black and white" "all or nothing" thinker, but I need to think more like online_user more often.
Are you in therapy or seeing a PDoc? It sounds like you could use some benefit from understanding why you think so negatively of yourself.
I hope you begin to feel better.
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~MICHELLE~ 
Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible.
~St. Francis of Assisi
If all you can do is crawl, start crawling.
~Rumi
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