Quote:
Originally Posted by Elana05
Thank you open eyes. but i am not young. i am 34. i have had much more competent times in my life. now i don't know what to make of it. i feel so lost. like i have failed big time. others have been able to do it, have a good job, to keep going. i just don't know how. i am relying on others to show me the way. i just feel really lost. i don't know how it's going to work. i am trying to have faith. but most of it has run out. i feel very sad that my parents don't get it. i am thankful that my dad has been there for me financially, but he has no idea. i am constantly letting him (and his wife) down. my own mom isn't there for me, because its my job to keep her happy. she never asks me how i feel because she can't take it (she has said so). my partner is strained by my depression. in this way feel like i have no one, it is a very old feeling. true, now i have my t and i have pc. for this i am thankful. it just feels lonely and rather hopeless-- but i am trying. anyway, thanks.
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34 is still young. I remember when I was 34, thought much like you and had a lot on my plate, very similar to you but, the alcoholic slept next to me every night.
I can tell you, ME TOO. I didn't have PC back then, and I couldnt find a therapist, found a marriage/family coucelor that was murdered in a supermarket parking lot, never found who did it. I did have Al-anon and that helped me some, but somehow I was very lonely Elena.
You are not a failure, you are in very hard place in your life. Give it time Elena, keep trying, I am here to listen and give hugs, I can tell you with all my heart, I know how it feels. I can see a strong part in you, I can see your posts here and there, good, hang on to that, its a good part of you, me too. Just remember you can find me, Im right here,you can ask, I will answer.
Open Eyes
