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Originally Posted by rainbow8
It's stupid to tell her that I "love her". It makes me feel like I should be punished. No, no one ever punished me for loving them. I honestly don't know where that thought comes from. I don't express love easily and I want to be able to. Not romantic love, just love. I need to talk about love because I always start to cry when I think about it.
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I too found that subjects of love made me cry. I realized for myself that it came down to the fact that my mother could never show me that she loved me. The subject of love made me cry because I needed to mourn that my mother couldn't show me that she loved me.
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Originally Posted by granite1
i hope your T is willing to discuss this with you and why you have so much trouble expressing love.
maybe it was never validated that you love.and it is important that now it is validated .you need to know that it matters to your T that you care about her.you need to feel it matters.
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THis is a good point granite! It reminds me that with me also, my mom wouldn't allow me to love her. She was in her own world with no connection with me so she couldn't show me that she loved me and I couldn't show her that I loved her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by rainbow8
why I just couldn't remember that she's told me that she accepts all of my parts. The last thing she would do is reject me, but I forgot that. It hurt too much when she didn't respond to my feelings and I did feel like she rejected me.
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Because you were being triggered? The past was being triggered up?