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Originally Posted by WikidPissah
Forgetfulness can be irritating from a T. I hate when T doesn't remember what we worked on the week before, or when he says we are going to do something next week...but never do it. Sigh. I usually let it slide, but it's definitely not good for me.
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I had that thing with a former t suggesting we could do something the next week and then never bringing it up. I got pretty frustrated and felt like there was no direction. I did ask once if she remembered what we'd discussed the previous session and she did. Then I started to think she wanted me to direct the topics more than I did. I was frustrated with the lack of direction and several cancellations in a row to the point I stopped seeing her. But w the next t I did have some productive sessions where I directed things a lot more. Anyway, you said your t is actually forgetting and I think that would be annoying. I think maybe t's who know they don't have good memories should make more effort to write things down after the session or something. I have to admit I don't have a good memory either, so I can understand not remembering everything, but there are limits.
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Originally Posted by Elli-Beth
I first saw my T eight years ago when there were 3 major traumas at the same time. It was a short course of therapy so I could just hang on and get my life back on track, then I didn't see him again until 6 months ago when one if the issues came back. Now we're doing long-term work to make sure it never comes back.
Anyway, after we started up again it was obvious he didn't remember the other two traumas, and he'd since switched offices and the old records had been destroyed. So one of the traumas I had to remind him about and the other one is still not mentioned. In a way I'm glad his memory is bad, because it's almost like I get a fresh start, but then a part of me is all"Ugh... I can't believe I have to tell him all over again"
And my T has also used the phrase "impressionistic memory" to describe himself
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That's too bad, Ellie. I think t's should take more time to keep notes sometimes.
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Originally Posted by lastyearisblank
Also names matter. My past T misspelled my name in an email to me and it pissed me off because he wrote it as a another name. Anglicizing it to boot. Like let's say my name was Lu Shen-- and he wrote Lucy (that's not my name.. just an e.g.). It's arguably a huge difference in who you are. That wouldn't piss me off but someone I'm working closely and write checks for on a weekly basis should not be making that mistake.
Anyhooo!! Haha, I don't wanna derail the thread... a T forgetting your cat's name is ok. Them forgetting your marital status or important details of your upbringing is not.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lastyearisblank
It didn't! I'm not like militant about it but I like my name (and really don't care for the English version of it).
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I can't tell if I'm following you lyib. I think your "It didn't" was in response to my "Anglicizing a name could show insensitivity," right? You mean when your t Anglicized your name it wasn't due to insensitivity in his case? But you were pissed off about it because he wrote it as another name (not because it was Anglicized)?
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Originally Posted by jbmomg
i am sorry, i thought him forgetting about your parents was sad and the hilarious part when you said if stick your foot in your mouth t would forget so you wouldn't have to be embarrassed..
sorry for the confusion
sending safe hugs
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haha, no need to apologize jbmong!
I appreciated your comment. I was kind of apologizing for making you sad since it wasn't actually bothering me that he forgot. But I see that it could sound sad.