Recently, my T quit giving me hugs in part for the same reason your T never touches you. Because she felt I had, due to my borderline, attached undue importance and intensity to the hugs.....which actually in truth I had done and had gotten way attached to her. It was a huge rupture and hurt badly.....still hurts.
And yet they were so helpful to me and I miss them greatly......but the fact is they're gone forever because T feels it's best for me and for my therapy not to have them. I respect her but feel like she is wrong to say 'never' and it is more hurtful than not in the long run to do it this way........although I do see that without touch at all I have been able to focus better on therapy because I don't feel as attached to her herself.....But I think it would still be OK to have them again someday. Ah well, so as rainbow goes through this struggle with her email/attachment to T/reality of t relationship, it reminds me of my struggle to accept the no-hugs forever policy (although that feels like way too black and white thinking on her part!) and the reality of my own T relationship.