sure... however you have to come here and get me first. I filed the invite away... (threw it on a stack of papers that are related to that organization...which is stacked on some stuff I haven't done for myself/them.... which is next to anothe stack...) and I'm not a stacking person.

oh well. I'm trying to numb out and not feel.

T reminds me (finished my sentence...) I have to learn to... accept my disability. I don't know how. It isn't like I ignore it or can ignore it. How do you "accept" it without numbing and without thinking without thinking of what you used to do, what you can't do now... there isn't anything I have found that I CAN do... really... maybe if I could I could grab onto it, but there isn't anything...

ok. got to go play some computer game or something distracting... that's how I have to deal with this when I get this way. some life, eh?