((((((((swimmergirl))))))))

In my experience, the intensity of the dependency has definitely become less over time.

For a few years, I felt SO dependent on my T. We had a LOT of contact between sessions, I saw him twice a week, and it felt like it would never get "better".

Now, I still feel really, really attached to him. I think I will always feel "attached" in a healthy way, even when we don't see each other anymore. But I don't *need* him in the same way. I can go a week between appointments and be okay, I've learned to carry him with me so I can feel the safety and security of him without the physical presence of him.

I always wonder if this is what it feels like to grow up in a secure and loving environment...if people who grow up that way carry this deep security WITH them. It feels like such a gift.